i love changing the bulb

if i ever had any doubts about writing this post (which i did) today’s daily bread threw them out the window.  i often pray to God to reveal wise and true interpretations of bible passages.   i often don’t understand what certain things in the bible mean.  sometimes God reveals things immediately and sometimes it takes years.  i don’t give up on the bible because it’s challenging in fact, its rugged and difficult landscape compels me to read it more often and more slowly.

as some of you know, i have been reading the bible in chronological order for several years now (qu’ran is next so be easy).  we just entered the new testament!  and i’m particulary intrigued by what separates the old from the new … i am particuarly engrossed by how Jesus is portrayed, historicized, and the words that reportedly come directly from his mouth.  so, there are many phrases and verses i am trying to unpack like,  ‘do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine,’ (matthew 7:6).  these words seem to have a very obvious meaning but i just know there’s something more going on here so  i have also been re-reading parts to ensure the word sinks in to the cells of my brain and the holes of my spirit.

this post is really about matthew 6:22-23: ‘the lamp of the body is the eye. if therefore your eye is good, your whole body will be full of light.  but if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness …’

it had always nagged at me.  i was sure God was not speaking about the physical health of the eye.  eye infections, glaucoma, mucus, astigmatisms – these are not the signs of a ‘bad’ eye.  i wear glasses so i was like, my eye sees blurry … does that mean my whole body is blurry because of my near-sightedness?  no. 

i prayed.  i read the words over and over.  one day it came to me. (it may have already come to you and what i’m saying will not be news.)   the eye is a metaphor for perspective.  because an eye is a viewfinder and perspective means point of view.   thus, perspective is the lamp of the body.  perspective will determine how you see everything.  and as we all know, our perspective can be light (positive, good) or dark (negative, bad). 

as a person who suffered through a medium-sized depression i know what it is like to have a bad eye and to see darkness in everything.  and i have experienced darkness taking over my entire body and life. 

understanding this verse in this way affirmed what i had recently come to believe as i dug my way out of the dark – happiness is a choice.  we choose to have good, light-filled eyes or dark, hopeless eyes.  the choice is not always easy especially if you are living in a dark environment or going through dark times but, the choice is there. 

the awakening of this passage for me also encourages me to forever leave depression behind.  and in that Godwinky kind of way i received the following e-mail in the same week that all this was revealed to me:

beloved, if you can receive it , i am releasing you from the spirit of heaviness so that you no longer have to struggle with depression.  let the darkness go and allow my light to restore, refresh and renew every part of your being.   i am not saying that you will not face difficulties and disappointments, but you do not have to allow the devil to take you down to the pit with discouragement.  rise up and recieve this freedom from emotional bondage, says the Lord. ‘therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed.’ (john 8:36)

i’m committed to keeping my eye clean, healthy, and bright.  i keep this e-mail in my bible.  thank you, Lord.

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